Bowties and Stetsons!

Movie: The Adventures of Ford Fairlane

Year: 1990

Budget: Unknown

About: A rock and roll detective named Ford Fairlane (Yes, it’s silly) solves a case about a murdered Rock Star. And blah blah blah.

Review: The most cheesiest movie ever watched. You can give this a watch. But just remember this: Ford Fairlane is the most insane rock and roll detective i have ever seen.

Other Info: This movie got razzies, for Worst Actor, Worst Picture, and Worst Screen Play. It was also nominated for Worst Director, and Twice for Worst Supporting Actor. Box Office: $21, 413, 250. (Domestic)

Edit: Yeah at the time I wrote this, I was really vague on this review and the whole blah blah blah part was just an oversight and a bit silly. Overall, the movie was cheesy and Andrew Dice Clay despite being a comedian had his ego trip with this movie. The plot involved him being a rock and roll detective solving a case about a murdered Rock Star and the plot tries to stay on course but it ends up going off the rails later on. The cameos were a good selection though for the time.

Movie: Moonraker

Year: 1979

Budget: 34 million dollars

About: James Bond goes into space to stop Drax, pretty much it. (And puns, can’t forget those)

Review: I didn’t like it very much. And Jaws got a girlfriend?! What!?  No, just no. If you like James Bond, i recommend this movie, just make sure you don’t get confused during the part where James Bond goes into space. SPAAAACE

Edit: Yeah sorry, James Bond in space? I mean it sounds good on paper (Or in the book if he ever went into space) but on screen? Not so much. Keep in mind, the Roger Moore era Bond movies were a mixed bag so I wouldn’t be surprised if people have differing opinions on this.

Movie: For your eyes only

Year: 1981

Budget: 28 million dollars

About: Explosions, Death, Making-out, puns, etc. Your typical bond movie.

Review: It was bad, and the song by Sheena Easton is just..bad. Why is it called For your eyes only? It should be called: I Love Being Awesome and You don’t know it. Give this a watch if you really like James Bond movies. Just..don’t be alarmed when you hear alot of puns.

Edit: Yeah, the Roger Moore era was a mixed bag for his movies. Despite having good moments, there are gonna be cheesy or bad parts as well.

Movie: Quantum Of Solace

Year: 2008

Budget: 200 million dollars

About: James Bond seeks revenge after his lover dies (Vesper Lynd) And he soon meets Dominic Greene. And a Bond Girl, and well you get the idea.

Review: Overall, this movie was bad. BAAAD. The theme song was whiny!

Edit: Despite the movie’s faults, it’s enjoyable. This movie was also impacted by the writers strike. The editing was a mess and the fight scenes are reminisce of a video game quick time event. The theme song while whiny, the instrumental version is really good.

Movie: On Her Majesty’s Secret Service

Year: 1969

Budget: 7 million dollars

About: James Bond is back, and he faces his most dangerous enemy, Blofeld. But this time in the mountains of the swiss alps.

Review: It’s the worst Bond movie i have ever seen. The ending was bad! So bad that i was puzzled. If you like James Bond, give this a watch. But just make sure you are prepared for the ending.

Edit: I was kind of harsh with this as at the time, I wasn’t a big fan of George Lazenby during this. But now looking back, the movie was good despite the glaring issues you may miss. But the ending did make an impact on James Bond as a whole though.

Movie: Batman Forever

Year: 1995

Budget: 100 million dollars

About: Batman and Robin team up to stop Two-Face and The Riddler from taking over Gotham.

Review: It’s bad, not as bad as Batman and Robin though. At least they tried their best. The Ridder’s plan however was stupid. A Brainwashing machine to make you powerful? No, just no. If you want to watch this movie, be my guest. Just..try not to laugh too hard.

Movie: I Drink Your Blood

Year: 1970

Budget: None

About: A townside with people in it, and a boy gets blood from a dog, which happens to have rabies. He fills them up into the pies, and a tribe of crazy people go insane, causing havoc. And the trailer doesn’t help either. The narrator is like hyped on drugs or something.

Review: Crappy, low budget, drugged pies, and stupidity. If you really want to watch this, be my guest. Just make sure to have some whiskey or other drinks with you just in case.